Moments like these are few and far between...

I've kind of been in a slump of the spiritual variety lately. It's weird because usually Holy Week and Easter are some of my higher points on the roller coaster called faith, but no matter what I did the last week or so I just couldn't get into the groove of the season. So I've been kind of bummed out lately because I just haven't been feeling "it." "It" being the Holy Spirit or a sense of oneness with God, whatever you want to call it. So I've been trying to be in prayer more than usual and be open to "it" or the Spirit. I'll have to be honest and say that I haven't had much success. It's hard for old dogs to learn new tricks, you know?

So this morning in chapel I was completely smacked upside the head by "it" or the Holy Spirit, whatever. We had a simple service of table and healing. The moment I sat down the song "Table of Love" by Josh Elson and Andra Moran popped into my head. I literally thought how great it would be if we sang that during communion. Well, guess what. It was played during communion. Now this may not seem like something too crazy to you, but I was floored. I started crying, like any daughter of my mother would, and barely held it together in a chapel full of my classmates and professors. 

One of the only ways I've experienced the Holy Spirit, aside from through people, has been through music. Specifically the right song or lyric played or sung at exactly the right time, saying to me the the exact thing I need to hear at that moment. This has happened at retreats (remember that retreat in Kansas, Lindsey?), camps, mission trips, and in my car or room when I'm all by myself. To me, the perfect song at the right time has been God's little message to me, giving me the encouragement I need. Well, it hadn't happened in a long time. I'd almost forgotten about how music affects me until this song came on. 

Here we are, you and me;

I wonder if we're supposed to be

here at this table.

Draw me in as I am;

I hope that you will understand

as I come to this table of love.

I am tired, I am worn,

I am broken, I am torn.

So I come to this table.

I let your peace fill my soul,

cleanse my heart, and make me whole

here at this table of love.

I've come here to lay it all down.

You've come to lift me up,

and now we're forever bound

by this bread and by this cup

here at this table of love.

I was lost, now I'm found,

since we all have gathered 'round

here at this table.

I was blind, now I see 

all the ways you welcome me

here at this table of love.

I've come here to lay it all down.

You've come to life me up,

and now we're forever bound

by this bread and by this cup

here at this table of love.

This song has always spoken to me and I hadn't heard it for so long. But it was perfect for the moment. And it's perfect for this moment in my life. I feel refreshed, rejuvenated by what I experienced this morning. But as much as I love that this happened today I know it will eventually wear off. So this wonderful day is yet another reminder that I need to be on the lookout for "it." But don't we all?