Ch-ch-ch-changes

As I've been facing my last semester at Drury head on, I've been thinking about how much my life is going to change in the next four months. As much as I'm sad, I'm also excited. I'm terrified to leave my comfortable little bubble at Drury that I've filled with friends who seem more like family, professors who feel more like friends, and kids at church to play with and love on. 

It's not like I don't think I'll be successful at another place, it's that I don't know if I want to. I've grown so much at Drury - I don't even know who I was before I came here. If it ain't broke don't fix it, right? But I don't have a choice. I'm graduating so I can't take anymore classes, I can't work for the chaplain's office, and there's no seminary in Springfield I want to go to in order to keep working at my church. So it's like I'm being pushed out of the nest and I'm scared about it. And even if I did stay in this God-forsaken town (I know, a little harsh) it's not like my friends would be here anymore because they're graduating too.

I've sent in my applications and now I'm playing the waiting game to hear back from the seminaries. I've done my part to movie on from here (even though I was kicking and screaming the whole time).

I'm just terrified about everything after May 17th. I wish I had something profound to say about it, but I don't. I just don't want to do any of it.

I'm just going to let David Bowie say it:

And my time was running wild

A million dead-end streets

Every time I thought I'd got it made

It seems the taste was not so sweet

So I turned myself to face me

But I've never caught a glimpse

Of how the others must see the faker

I'm much too fast to take that test

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Ch-ch-changes

don't have to be a richer man

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Ch-ch-changes

Don't want to be a better man

Time may change me

But I can't trace time

I watch the ripples change their size

But never leave the stream

Of warm impermanence

So the days flow through my eyes

But the days still seem the same

And these children that you spit on

As they try to change their worlds

Are immune to your consolations

They're quite aware of the what they're going through

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Ch-ch-changes

Where's your shame

You've left us up to our necks in it

Time may change them

But you can't trace time

Strange fascination, fascinating me

Changes are taking the pace I'm going through

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Ch-ch-changes

Look out you rock 'n' rollers

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Ch-ch-changes

Pretty soon you're gonna get a little older

Time may change me

But I can't trace time.